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A whisper in heaven

 

An amber orange glow blazed boldly across the twilight sky

Its rays burning through the blue grey clouds of the now near night

My thoughts raced wildly

Aging questions still unanswered push hard against my skull

Playing menacingly with my already fragile mind

My thoughts turn to tears

The million me’s I could have been, rush streaming down my face

A face etched deep with the lines of all my many might have beens

Thoughts turn to regret

The where-to-from-here has once again failed to make itself known

I’m stuck pondering my own very present mortality

My thoughts turn

To places deep within the recesses of my silent mind

Dark secret places where death is warm and pretentious

And my thoughts

Become easy and effortless and flowing and unrestrained

And peace of mind at last seems tangible, and almost mine

My thoughts are

All too rationally entertaining my possible ends

Something which by its very nature is irrational

My thoughts turn

To wonderings of heaven and hell and maybe even God

And books that might or might not be of divine origin

My thoughts turn

To harped angels and jewelled streets and paradise and everlasting afterlife and hallelujah choruses and obituaries and wakes and a mother’s tears and the confusion of two sisters and never walking nieces on sun soaked beaches hands dripping with ice-cream and first sunrises and last sunsets and all the questions I have asked and will never know the answers to as my heavy glazed eyes shimmers shut and I wonder if I will be so much as a whisper in heaven…

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